Russell said "You Don't Always Have to Be Up"
May 23, 2022When you were in 7th grade, you were mid way through the track meet 2 mile when you realized you didn't know if you could win the race. You panicked. Instead of harnessing your energy and emotion, you checked out. You checked out because you thought that you would look like a failure if you got second. So you slowed down, faked a side cramp, and pulled yourself out of the race.
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After sunset volleyball today, You were talking about friendships with your guy friends. You were talking about positive influences. Your friend Russell said "I just want you to know, there's not too many people like you that I've met. You have such an amazing energy and light, and I just want to acknowledge you." But, he added, "you don't always have to be up. You're human and you've got bad days too."
Why do you feel this specific discovery was significant?
This discovery that you gleaned from Russell was significant because for a while, you have lived your life mostly to make sure you presented a happy face to the world. Because of this, everyone grew to expect you to be the positive and even (naively optimistic) young man that they could always count on to brighten their day.
But when you got hurt back in high school and had to miss out on sports and life events, it seemed like no one bothered to try to lift you up. No one cared. No one even seemed to notice. You were alone in a dark room going "Come on God, where are you when I need you? Come on friends, where are you when I need you? Come on family: Where are you? Because I need you guys now. I need someone to lift me up. I need someone to lift my spirit today. And yet there was no one. Not only could you not trust in your Body any more, you could not trust God to keep you safe. You could not count on your friends to come and cheer you up. You couldn't count on your own mother to change your ice packs for your surgically-altered salvaged leg. People didn't care about you. They only cared about how you made them feel. That was a tough lesson.
As you sit back and survey your discovery and insights from this stack, what is the singular, simple, lesson on life you’re learning from this?
As a man, You're not entitled to anything. You're not entitled to love, attention, or warmth from anyone. As a man, it is your duty to Give Those Things and expect nothing in return. As a man, it is your job to make the world a little better every day, whether it be by brightening someone's spirit, or by serving as an inspiration on what a strong body, Faith, friend, and young businessman looks like.
It's not easy, and it sure as hell isn't fair. Even if you give all you have, there are no guarantees it's all going to work out in the end. But that's life. Now go out there and give your best today anyway. Don't you dare worry about failure or looking stupid. Don't you dare pull yourself out of the race. Instead, focus on being the best you can in this moment. Be the Best Man you can be. That's all you can do. And, you'll find, it's enough.
